Recently I had a birthday. Nothing special as far as ages go, except as one friend pointed out: "I won't be able to divide my birthday by 11 again for another few years". So, as I stated, nothing special as ages go. But just as each year that passes makes birthdays less exciting, each year that passes makes birthdays more special. The build up that occurred in your teens and twenties really loses it's flair in your thirties. There's no countdown to midnight so that you can hit the bars for a billion and two shots. There's no lamenting with friends about how life is over at 25. The day comes along with a change in digits on the race entries, and the day goes. And as much as that is true, it's totally not true.
Each year I find that the special things that my friends and family, namely Heather and my mom for the past ten years, do for me leave even more of a mark on my heart. Every year Heather surprises me with something - a cupcake happy hour at Whole Foods, a dinner with friends, a light show in Logan Square to name just a few. I remember each little thing as if it were yesterday. The older you become, the more you realize that it's the people in your life, not the places or the cost or the extravaganza. Even those who only remember because Facebook reminds them have taken the time to post on your wall. The text messages, the cards, the phone calls and the simple 140 character tweets all remind me of the different phases of my life and how much they have shaped me to be the person that I am today. Life passes so quickly. I can't believe that I'm thirty-three already. Then I look back at my life as a teenager, and how I draw from my parents lessons to this day. (...I also draw from my learned ability to sneak alcohol into a water bottle...). Life in your twenties seemed difficult, but I met my best friend then and can't imagine my life without her. I moved out of my comfort zone more than once, and learned much about myself, my life and the kind of person that I want to be. I had my heart broken, my heart warmed and found a way to pick myself up again more than once. Each and every time life threw a curve ball, I've been able to look back at the hard learned lesson that I can take forward. I think about my relationships in the my twenties. Sheesh. What was I thinking?? I fell in love three times.. They are all good people, but they weren't the wonderful one for me. I look back on each relationship and can tell you what I learned from it - what I realized for the next time that I need to be successful in a loving relationship. I thank all of them for that (...not so much for the heartbreak that accompanied). I rocketed into my thirties and have found love and strength from the first 30 years, as well as the amazing folks at Back on My Feet who have not only inspired me but have befriended me, even when it's 5:30AM and I haven't brushed my hair let alone my teeth. My steps to date have led me to an amazing man who brings all of the things that I was looking for in prior relationships and loves me just the same. We have our flaws, but every aspect of my life has had minor bumps, breaks and blemishes The past three decades have enabled me to be closer with my mother, my father and my brother. They made me what I hope is a better friend to those around me and a better colleague at work.
Lucky for me, my life is full of love. The Beatles said that 'all you need is love', and you know what, I believe it. If you love people, they love you back; if you love your life, it will produce the great things that you ask of it; if you love yourself, things will ultimately be easier in the long run (maybe not the Saturday morning miles kind of long run...). Love positions us to be everything that we've ever expected out of life and a whole lot more. I don't really LOVE being thirty-three, but I love everything that got me here and will eventually settle into loving what this year brings me too.
Until then, happy birthday to me (and Sophia Loren and Amina Wirjosemito.)
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