How to Run with Confidence

Just over eighteen months ago a very good friend and running buddy of my cousin was killed while cycling on a Sunday morning. Heather Boyum was following all of the written and unwritten rules of the road and yet left her family and friends far too soon when a drunk driver irresponsibly and recklessly hit her from behind near Rochester, New York. I read every article that was released as those responsible we're given their sentencing and Heather's family tried to find a way to grieve the mother, wife, teacher, friend, and triathlete passing. It broke my heart that the extended running community had experienced this senseless tragedy. 

Fast forward. 

Last week the world learned of Meg Menzies death. Meg was an avid runner training for the Boston marathon, a wife and a mother to three young children. She was out for a morning run when she was hit and killed by a drunk driver. 

I did not know Meg or Heather however they both seem to have very similar qualities as I'm once again reading all there is to know about Meg's death. Friends and family describe them both as the 'nicest person I've ever met'. They rave about their love for their children, their spouses, their friends and their communities. I'm sure that you can think of others that may not have received as much press but have had the same impact on their loved ones. 

I'm pretty sure that society's increased interest in fitness, especially endurance sports, contributes to the increased accidents involving vehicles and athletes.  I'm certain that this is a sad excuse.  I used to dread some runs due to feeling lazy, feeling sore, being uber busy at the office or at home, among a thousand other excuses, but today I can add the fear of drunk driving, the fear of abduction and/or rape, and the fear of texting while driving.  Its not enough to tell runners and cyclists to "be more aware" of their surroundings.  Being a city runner comes with a few hazards on a good day.  I've nearly jumped over the hood of a taxi who only looked one way; I've dodged the car that inches into the crosswalk while not paying attention; I've landed my fist on a hood or two for people who are simply disrespectful to runners.  In each of these situations, I've nearly been paralyzed, albeit for a simple second, by the thought of being hit by a car.  Now enter a drunk driver or an absent-minded texter.  You simply cannot dive out of the way fast enough to avoid these accidents.  

I can't say that I have the answer to ensuring the safety of runners and cyclists everywhere.  The death of Heather Boyum has sparked her friends and family to aggressively pursue changing the laws in the State of New York with regards to DUI punishments (Sign their Petition Here), but I know that this needs to be a bigger movement, a broader push in order to make a global impact.  How do I, how do WE, make a bigger impact to lessen the chances of this happening to someone else?  The city that I love has gotten drastically smaller in order for me to lessen the concerns while running alone.  How can I go back to the mere reasons that I started running the first place - solitude, mind-clearing, empowering and strength (and the ability to dance publicly to those amazing 80's tunes on my ipod)?  The answer can't simply be to run with a buddy at all times; it's not feasible and it doesn't fix the problem.  And frankly, with the accidents that we have seen lately, there isn't strength in numbers.  Education is part of the answer, but accountability is a larger part.  What I do know is that running shouldn't be accompanied by a constant nagging concern for what could happen each and every time you lace up your running shoes. So, the best that I can do at the very moment is to ask that you make wise decisions when you're starting your car.  Call a friend, call AAA or call a cab if you've had too many drinks or if you're simply too tired to get behind the wheel.  You could be saving a life with these simple decisions...and that life could be your own.  



If you're in the Rochester area, check out the memorial 5K that has been established in Heather's memory:  Iron Angel 5k

Continue to follow fundraising and remembrance events for Meg Menzies by visiting http://www.megsmiles.com/

Those Three Special Words

I know what you're immediately thinking. This post is another sappy tale about my love for the man-friend, or the post that I've been you I with writing about why in God's name we're not engaged yet. Alas, this post is about another three words: You're Being Promoted. 

I find myself learning new things everyday which constantly validates that I'm still in the right career. However, what is the line in which you've learned enough and done enough that someone thinks that you deserve a fancier title and more money?  I certainly do not have this answer. I think about the guidance that I give employees every day about their career path including technical skills and soft skills combined with experiences and accountabilities. It sounds good, right?  Coaching someone else's career is so much easier than finding a way to advance your own. Truthfully I think that as much as you need the pieces that I mentioned prior, you need the stars to align too. There has to be a need at the right time; there has to be someone who has noticed your rockstar work who has some influence; there needs to be a mere need to pay you more money and more work available. It does happen because I've seen it. Sometimes it's luck and sometimes it's persistence but it's never without timing. ...and boy do I pray for timing a lot!!  

This week we promoted a girl who applied for a role "on a whim". She isn't prepared for the role and not ready for the promotion but the hiring manager chose her. A move from manager to director, a $30k plus increase in base salary and tons of travel to great locations. All "on a whim". ::sigh::  The stars aligned and the timing worked and this girl will find herself in a new tax bracket by the end of the month. Am I happy for her?  Sure!  Am I baffled how people stumble into these ones despite spending almost ten years in a HR career?  Definitely. 

The working world seems so easy some days:  show up, work hard, go home.  Other days it feels like a course in Mandarin. The 40-hour work week has gotten fuzzy. Work/life balance is less of a balance and more like one of those crazy headstand poses in yoga. These things become the expectation and then the norm and then you're simply "achieving" until you step up your game again. The expectation is constantly on the rise. And while I believe that we should continue to raise the bar in order to stay ahead in business, when does the bar raising mean recognition for those who can follow it?  Is there ever a level in which people have delighted someone enough to be above the bar?  Or will we chase the bar forever?

I wish I knew the answers to these questions. I'd probably have gotten promoted and written a book long ago. I'm all ears though if someone has the answers, or a suggestion on a book that may hold them. There are A LOT of books out there. It's hard to find ones that are relevant and not hokey. I'm pretty confident that I'm doing good work, but am still waiting for that fancy chicken kitchen timer to ding with my time!